Here are some Speculations:
Me: Did Adam and Eve have belly buttons?
Mae: Tell me.
Me: Perhaps. That’s where, when God was baking them, he poked them to see if they were done.
Mae: Tell me another one.
Me: Did they have reproductive organs?
Mae: Where are you going with this?
Me: Assume so, in order to procreate. And assume Eve had breasts designed for nurturing children.
Mae: They may not have had bottle feeding in those days.
Me: She did have a number of children after the Fall.
Mae: In winter, you mean?
Me: No. After Adam and Eve fell into sin.
Mae: Is sex sin?
Me: Depends. But in their case it was disobeying God.
Mae: Oh yes. God had told them not to eat the apple.
Me: Probably not an apple. A serpent persuaded Eve to eat the forbidden fruit.
Mae: A talking snake?
Me: Yes, but with a forked tongue. It deceived her. Women are easily deceived.
Mae: You know why men like smart women? Opposites attract.
Me: Anyway, Eve persuaded Adam to eat some too.
Mae: Men are easily persuaded.
Me: Eating the fruit of that tree might mean presuming to judge between good and evil.
Mae: What about judging between fact and fiction?
Me: Creation and evolution?
Mae: Precisely.
Me: Another time. Let’s continue with the story. Adam and Eve felt ashamed that they were naked.
Mae: Nothing to be ashamed of, unless you’re overweight or something.
Me: They hid when they heard God walking in the garden. God called out to Adam and he responded.
Mae: Adam broke their cover.
Me: God penalized them for their sin. One of the penalties was kicking them out of the garden.
Mae: They might have tried sneaking back in when he wasn’t looking.
Me: He placed some cherabim to guard the garden. But the main penalty for sin was death.
Mae: Execution by lethal injection, perhaps.
Me: They didn’t die right away. They aged like us, although more slowly.
Mae: Not a bad punishment.
Me: If Adam and Eve hadn’t sinned, they still would have procreated.
Mae: Unless they used contraceptives.
Me: But some theologians believe there was no death before the Fall.
Mae: With both procreation and deathlessness, there could be overcrowding.
Me: Precisely! And not just in the Garden of Eden, but in the whole world.
Mae: There may be overcrowding nowadays in the nicer-to-live-in parts of the world.
Me: Nicest-to-live-in of all would have been the Garden of Eden.
Mae: In a nice little summer cottage.
Me: At first Adam was alone there, tending to the garden. Not good.
Mae: He needed help?
Me: He examined all the animals but didn’t find a suitable helper among them.
Mae: No ape pretty enough? Men tend to look on outward appearance.
Me: God put Adam to sleep, removed a rib, and created Eve out of it.
Mae: Rib removal would require more than a local anesthetic. How had Adam been created?
Me: God created him out of dust, fully grown.
Mae: Did he know by instinct not to suck his thumb?
Me: Probably. He was created in the image of God.
Mae: Then does God have a belly button?
Me: God doesn’t have a human form, though he sometimes took the form of a man.
Mae: What did he look like?
Me: Not much different from men in those days. He was one of three men talking to Abraham.
Mae: What were they talking about?
Me: God told Abraham that he was about to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah because of their sinfulness.
Mae: Sodomy is sin, I guess.
Me: Abraham asked God if he would destroy Sodom if there were fifty righteous there. God agreed not to destroy it for their sake. Abraham then asked what if five of the fifty righteous were lacking. Then “What if forty are found there?” “What if thirty are found there?” “What if twenty are found there?” “What if ten are found there?” God said that for the sake of ten he would not destroy it. Then he went his way.
Mae: Abraham should have asked one more question: “Do you have a belly button?”
Me: Did Adam and Eve have belly buttons?
Mae: Tell me.
Me: Perhaps. That’s where, when God was baking them, he poked them to see if they were done.
Mae: Tell me another one.
Me: Did they have reproductive organs?
Mae: Where are you going with this?
Me: Assume so, in order to procreate. And assume Eve had breasts designed for nurturing children.
Mae: They may not have had bottle feeding in those days.
Me: She did have a number of children after the Fall.
Mae: In winter, you mean?
Me: No. After Adam and Eve fell into sin.
Mae: Is sex sin?
Me: Depends. But in their case it was disobeying God.
Mae: Oh yes. God had told them not to eat the apple.
Me: Probably not an apple. A serpent persuaded Eve to eat the forbidden fruit.
Mae: A talking snake?
Me: Yes, but with a forked tongue. It deceived her. Women are easily deceived.
Mae: You know why men like smart women? Opposites attract.
Me: Anyway, Eve persuaded Adam to eat some too.
Mae: Men are easily persuaded.
Me: Eating the fruit of that tree might mean presuming to judge between good and evil.
Mae: What about judging between fact and fiction?
Me: Creation and evolution?
Mae: Precisely.
Me: Another time. Let’s continue with the story. Adam and Eve felt ashamed that they were naked.
Mae: Nothing to be ashamed of, unless you’re overweight or something.
Me: They hid when they heard God walking in the garden. God called out to Adam and he responded.
Mae: Adam broke their cover.
Me: God penalized them for their sin. One of the penalties was kicking them out of the garden.
Mae: They might have tried sneaking back in when he wasn’t looking.
Me: He placed some cherabim to guard the garden. But the main penalty for sin was death.
Mae: Execution by lethal injection, perhaps.
Me: They didn’t die right away. They aged like us, although more slowly.
Mae: Not a bad punishment.
Me: If Adam and Eve hadn’t sinned, they still would have procreated.
Mae: Unless they used contraceptives.
Me: But some theologians believe there was no death before the Fall.
Mae: With both procreation and deathlessness, there could be overcrowding.
Me: Precisely! And not just in the Garden of Eden, but in the whole world.
Mae: There may be overcrowding nowadays in the nicer-to-live-in parts of the world.
Me: Nicest-to-live-in of all would have been the Garden of Eden.
Mae: In a nice little summer cottage.
Me: At first Adam was alone there, tending to the garden. Not good.
Mae: He needed help?
Me: He examined all the animals but didn’t find a suitable helper among them.
Mae: No ape pretty enough? Men tend to look on outward appearance.
Me: God put Adam to sleep, removed a rib, and created Eve out of it.
Mae: Rib removal would require more than a local anesthetic. How had Adam been created?
Me: God created him out of dust, fully grown.
Mae: Did he know by instinct not to suck his thumb?
Me: Probably. He was created in the image of God.
Mae: Then does God have a belly button?
Me: God doesn’t have a human form, though he sometimes took the form of a man.
Mae: What did he look like?
Me: Not much different from men in those days. He was one of three men talking to Abraham.
Mae: What were they talking about?
Me: God told Abraham that he was about to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah because of their sinfulness.
Mae: Sodomy is sin, I guess.
Me: Abraham asked God if he would destroy Sodom if there were fifty righteous there. God agreed not to destroy it for their sake. Abraham then asked what if five of the fifty righteous were lacking. Then “What if forty are found there?” “What if thirty are found there?” “What if twenty are found there?” “What if ten are found there?” God said that for the sake of ten he would not destroy it. Then he went his way.
Mae: Abraham should have asked one more question: “Do you have a belly button?”
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